Yesterday was Mother’s Day, and it got me thinking; it’s nice to have a day set aside to celebrate us Mammas and what we do, you know, to acknowledge our important role. Yes, I’m well aware that it’s just another Hallmark holiday and that every day should be Mother’s Day but let’s face it, it isn’t. As good as our kids are, they don’t always listen and aren’t perfect, so that “every day is Mother’s Day” BS is exactly that…BS! Andddd let’s get real here, how many of you had your kids piss you off yesterday? Ya, I thought so, haha.
Being a Mother is one of the toughest jobs you can have, and many will say that it’s the most important job in the world, but I’m going to take it a step further. All of that means nothing if you aren’t taking care of yourself. I always say this, but if you, yourself, aren’t happy and in a good place, how can you be of any good to anyone around you, especially your kids that are watching your every move and looking to you to lead by example as well as offer them the love and support they need.
The thing that what we Mammas tend to forget is that the minute we give birth and have our little bundles of joy wrapped up in our arms, we are instantly hit with a case of amnesia and can’t remember who we were before that. In a blink of an eye, you’re pregnant, then you’re pushing out a kid, and boom, that kid is now in your arms, you’re now a mom, and you’re thinking to yourself, wtf just happened? Everything you knew leading up to that moment just went out the window. We become so consumed with our new role and title that we tend to forget who we truly are, who we were before that cute little baby that we love with every ounce of our being entered our lives. It’s sad when you think about it, don’t you agree? And just throwing this out there, but I never heard dads mention going through anything like this, haha, just sayin’!
I’m not trying to shit on dads here because their role is also super important, but for real, they approach it totally different from us Mammas. They don’t let their new title be the be-all and end-all in their life. They are still the same man they were the day before, the same husband, son, brother, friend, etc.; just now, they have a kid, and so now they’re a dad too. It’s rare to see women take on this new role and approach it the same way a man does, and I think it sucks. So why can’t we take a page from their book? Who says that we still can’t be the same badass bitch we were before having a kid? Who says we can’t have a career and be a kickass mom at the same time? Who says that we can’t have a night out with our girlfriends? No one, that’s who! This is the shit we tell ourselves because we’re moms now, and all moms do is take care of the kids and put their needs and wants before those of our own. We need to stop because reality check; making ourselves a priority and giving a shit about ourselves does not make us bad moms. Again, do you see dads beating themselves up because they spent the weekend away with their buddies fishing? HAHA, not a chance!
What I’m trying to say is that being a mom is great and amazing, but it’s also challenging and exhausting, especially when you are consumed by it. As moms, we would never abandon our children, so why do we so easily abandon ourselves? What kind of message are we sending our kids by doing this and putting ourselves on the back burner? Do we want to send them the message that it’s ok not to care about ourselves? Or do we want to send a message that tells them that all aspects of our lives are important and that our relationship with ourselves is one that we need to constantly work on and nurture with love, kindness, compassion and understanding. Only when that happens can we genuinely offer and share everything we have given ourselves to those around us, including our children.
So while we count down to the next Mother’s Day in 364 days, take this time to remember the amazing person you are and celebrate it because you aren’t just a mom; you’re more than just a mom!